'Cause darling I wake up just to sleep with you, I open my eyes so I could see with you, And I live so I can die with you
March 5, 2020, is officially my ten year anniversary with my beautiful wife Mon Mode. When I asked her, timidly, exactly ten years ago, to be my girlfriend, I had no idea that ten years later, we would have moved 10+ times, lived in two continents, worked numerous jobs, launched digital careers, got engaged and married.
So today, in celebration of our decade of being a singular form - a formal and official couple - I am sharing the ten most important things I have learnt in these last ten years.
10. This isn’t a game with a winner and loser.
Your relationship is not a competition - you don't need to keep track of who is right and who is wrong. Life is a journey and going through it with someone you love is a blessing.
9. Never stop talking.
When it's fun and when it's hard and when it hurts and when it's for no reason, talk to each other. The moment that stuff gets uncomfortable and you stop talking to each other, the problems begin.
8. Build new hobbies together.
No that doesn't mean you do everything together. But it is useful if you're both into foreign films, or quirky brunch spots, or in our case, fashion and photography. It allows you to craft your hobby together.
7. Your family is my family.
Be very careful of how you treat your partner's family and what you say about them, especially to your partner. Once you embrace that they're also your family, you can emphasize with the inherent respect your partner has for their family.
6. Remind each other of commitments.
Be a gentle but firm reminder to your partner about commitments they have made, or step in and intervene about your partner taking on other commitments.
5. Plan for a life with no money.
This is one of the biggest pieces of advice we have given to others asking us: if you can be happy together with no salary, you will make it through anything. It was this mentality that allowed us to move around the world multiple times.
4. You have to hug everyday.
This is a little rule I made up - but it actually has a deeper reason. After years and years together and with how busy life can get, its actually so important to stop and physically hold each other.
3. Your partner is not a mind reader.
As much as you think you are in sync with each other, don't get it twisted that you are able to reach each others' minds. Share your thoughts and opinions often and frequently.
2. Talk about everything.
Yes this is here twice, for a different reason. Talk about the groceries, the room setup, your next Christmas, and your biggest goals and dreams.
1. Look back, plan forward, but enjoy the present.
Yes you should cherish all the beautiful moments you have shared in your life together. And for sure make plans for the future. But don't ever forget to stop and enjoy every single second of the present moment.
So I'm off to celebrate my day with my friends and family and I hope you enjoyed all of my life lessons. Do you have any you can share with me? I would love to hear them!
